Time in Karachi

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Defination of Love

My pick on one of the oldest question:-


Often we associate physical attraction with love. My question is… if that is love then what about a couple in their 70s… they (under normal obvious circumstances) can’t have any intimate or physical relationship, can they? So does that mean they stop loving the other? They still love each other (in most cases more than the time they got married) but their love is to take care of each other with the other is ill, make sure the other is eating properly, taking their medicine on time. The other day I saw an elderly couple, they didn’t look really well off, so they order one mix chaat and start sharing, now both of them wanted the other to eat more so they both kept telling the other they don’t feel like eating… That was an adorable display of love.

Physical relation is something even animals have but that doesn’t mean they're in love... love is for human beings and its for caring, being concerned, animals don’t care if the other one is alright or not, they just want to achieve their level of satisfaction and move on, but human beings when in an intimate contact with the one they love, make sure the other is not in pain or anything... so when people say love for wife is different than love for mom... I disagree... love is love... you love someone you care for, you get protective for, you want to give them everything you can & so on... these things remain the same for any relation you love.

Basically there's just one type of love... there aren’t different types of love because physical attraction is not love so when you say you first fall in love then physical attraction comes in... I would not agree to that because the thing, first you get to know someone, then something attracts you and then you fall in love with that person.

So basically what I’m saying is, it can’t be called love marriage... because you can’t love someone in a day

Okay lets put it this way... There are 3 couples

1. A & B
2. X & Y
3. M & N

Now A & B get attracted to each other on anything... lets say physical beauty your typical “Love at first sight” & they decided to marry... after marriage A realizes B is not the wife he was looking for or vice versa, because the other is only good looking but rude, selfish & what not... can A fall in love with B then? Or vice versa

On the other hand, X & Y are friends; first X is not attracted to Y but later when their friendship grows strong X finds out that Y is an amazing person... she's concerned about everyone, she's caring & bla bla bla... Now X wants to care for Y, he wants Y to be happy for she's always wishing good for everyone... That is when X begins to love Y because he knows he can take care of Y like no one else can and that’s a love marriage.

The reason I'm against arranged marriages is because when two people... M & N are introduced by their families k lo beta milo & see if you want to spend the rest of your life with this person, both M & N will present their best selves (may be fake) because they both know if the other approves me, we'll be together forever & then the other one will find out my real self but it'll be too late… ha ha ha (evil laugh)

Now lets see what love is; love is when you want to care for someone, when you get depressed if the other is depressed, you fight with other knowing it’ll all be well by the end of the day since you both don’t have any other choice but to make up and so on.

How do families operate in our society? Siblings fight but do they break all ties & decide they’re better off without each other so they don’t talk at all? No, if one member of family is ill the whole family is concerned & worried and doing anything they can to make the ill one comfortable, if I go to market to buy my favourite donut knowing that it is my sister’s favourite donut too so plan to buy 2, and if I find out there’s only one left at the shop, I’ll bring that home for my sister and if my sisters finds out I couldn’t get one as it was only one there, she’ll decide to share it with me. That is sacrifice for someone you love. Most of times, we have the same feeling for our close friends as well. All the same feelings are there for wife too. Then there’s an added physical attraction / intimate relation which is not love, that’s a different thing.

So I conclude this with following definition:-

“A feeling in which you think about someone else before you, you care for someone else more than you care for yourself without getting physically attracted to them is love”

Puri Sahib the Philosopher

Monday, January 4, 2010

Thank You!

My last post was exactly 2 months back i.e. 4th Nov. 09 and frankly speaking, I’ve sorta lost my appetite for writing but today I’m extremely bored and its too soon to hit bed. I still read all my favourite bloggers tough, well… not all of them but most of them :-) So I was reading a blog of Humaira where she mentioned that she was unable to write for a whole month & after a month when she finally got back to it, she checked her analytics & found out that she had over 1200 hits, wow! I mean she didn’t write for a whole month & still got so many hits… That kinda kicked me to check my analytics too and the result is as follows:-



I know my stats are no where near to her’s but… oh well, its always quality over quantity :P so I would like to thank you all for keeping a check :-)

New Year just started and I’ve a feeling that this year is going to be a great year, last year I left a lot of things and got used to a lot of new things, some are things I still want to leave… Somethings I left and still miss, somethings I left & am thankful that I’m away from them, some new things I got & now feel I don’t want them anymore and some new things which I got & my love for them is growing by each day… I still want to leave MSN tough as gtalk & skype are 100 times better alternatives but there’s something about msn which is not letting me part off…

I don’t know in which category I should put my passion for writing, clearly its not there anymore but like today… there are exceptional days… after giving it a thought I decided to declare myself as a legend… (I know I know I know :P)… Like Sean Connery takes 1 great movie every few years since he’s retired, I’ll also blog once in a blue moon… You might see me conducting some workshop on blogging (which is something in the pipeline btw) but I won’t write regularly… I simply don’t want to share every single detail of my life on the World Wide Web. First I thought to make a new blog with the name “From the pages of a Retired Blogger” but then I thought that would be too dramatic and also it’s a lot of hassle in making a new blog and then what about all you people who have nothing better to do in life then to check my blog for new posts? So I’m continuing with this account, fewer posts & a change of heading should do :-)

Puri Sahib declaring himself a "Retired Blogger" :-)